Oh, child of mine!

Oh, child of mine!

I do not wash clean clothes

And I don’t care what you say,

Pick the damned things off the floor

And put them all away!

Gravy and peas are not breakfast

And I don’t care what you say,

Eat that flaming toast right now,

Or you won’t go out to play!

Your finger is not a toothbrush

And I don’t care what you say,

Now brush your bloody teeth,

And scrub that plaque away!

You fecking do eat chicken

And I don’t care what you say,

Stop pushing it around the plate,

You’re eating it today!

The sink is not a toy

And I don’t care what you say,

Stop pouring shampoo down the drain,

You’ll block it up one day!

Bedtime was always eight

And I don’t care what you say,

Get your bloody PJ’s on,

It’s time to hit the hay!

The landing isn’t bed

And I don’t care what you say,

Calling me while standing there,

Is making me go grey!

Nightmares aren’t always bad

And I don’t care what you say,

You still run in for the safest snug,

Long may you stay that way!

Warrior Princess